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The Optimistic Eccentric

INFJ | Delve into a world of gray, where we could be us.

Curses, Baggins!

It took time, but there come's a point when you realise how hard you have been on yourself for what you have done, or all the experiences and individuals you come in contact with, even since your childhood.

Because of that...you matured faster than a normal child would do, felt deeper and wider than people would be comfortable of for prolonged periods (it sounds like length and breadth...some weird shape I guess) and thought further than you expected yourself to think...in a young age.

Suddenly, you feel like you're operating on another planet (especially when I write...), you start to analyze and visualize simultaneously on the go before you shapeshift according to the situation and person, and...you carry different weights for different periods. 

However, at some point, you start to realise that sometimes...it's just uncontrollable and not up to you to decide, plan and take action. Because...you're fully aware of your capabilities and your capacity to take on something, some goals may be realistically unattainable, some responsibilities are no meant for you to bear or take alone, or some individuals or experiences just didn't meant to "vibe" in life, no matter how hard you try. 

So...there come's a point when you would want to forgive both the new and old you and propel yourself to be better in all aspects, for the sake of people around you, yourself...and even the world, all while achieving dreams.

Welcome to the age of self-expression, freedom and there within, comes joy and enrichment of the soul (In other words...chase dreams, #YOLO)


1. Accept how things truly are. Look within, dissect the situation...and then weigh and feel the situation...to grasp how you truly feel or think about it. 

2. Bond with the circumstances, thoughts and emotions, and give yourself ample time to digest, process and understand them...at a comfortable pace and space.

If you would like, find someone or something neutral, comforting and reliable to help you tide over this process.

3. There comes a point...when you feel numb and tired of your senses (and influences from your environment), and amidst the silence, while piecing the puzzle pieces together...you slowly gain consciousness, clarity and perception.

Suddenly, you have some idea on how your past decisions affected you, some motivation to drive a new direction, and some idea on what your future plans, or your next steps, might be. 

4. As the common denominator of all of your experiences and relationships so far, you slowly learn and discover what attracts certain influences and experiences...and repels certain influences and experiences...to reach or come to a certain conclusion.

Under these influences, you might adopt some negative side effects that you are aware of and can potentially affect your interactions, or vibes, with people that you actually care about in the entire universe. And...you might feel extremely negatively (angry, distraught, distressed) due to the cause(s) of these implications because...you're hypersensitive to how it affects you, and people around you, especially if you highly value certain connections, which are extremely rare and meaningful in a lifetime. 

But still...be kind and forgive. Life is too short for drama...and chasing what we can't realistically attain, or doesn't enrich your being (in general). Thanks to these individuals and experiences, you gained new stories, lessons...and therefore, lifelong insights. Would hurt quite a bit in the beginning, but...trust the process, and trust yourself for what you can do. We will get by, towards a definite point, in time.

Not many things can be brighter and more colorful than a bit of optimism, hope and love, in a seemingly bleak and gray world. 

5. To forget...I admit that it's hard, unless you have the capability...to visualize, imagine and store all of the information somewhere in the recesses of your mind, deep enough for you not to remember it as vividly, even though...you may still feel negative feelings if you come across certain influences or stressors that remind you of a certain experience or individual. And then...you can shapeshift into an entirely different person...in just a short amount of time, with a great amount of willpower and mind power. 

However, these lessons that you learn can further drive you to prevent similar situations from occurring again in future. This might include self-improvement, whereby you find out areas that you wish to improve, visualize yourself into becoming who you wish to be, and start planning and acting on small, sustainable actions that will help you achieve your goal and become who you want to be. 

With every lesson, the cycle repeats itself all over again...and it gets better with time and experience.

More stories to listen, to absorb...and to tell, to our peers, our children in future...and for those in need. 
Together, we lead better lives...than what we may perceive we might have led before we embark on our journey. 

*I just realised how much I love spontaneous writing...can't believe I took around half an hour to think and write on the go...it's kind of crazy but oddly satisfying at the same time!








"Who do you think you are to think that way?" 

That's right, who are we to place judgement on ourselves, and not see ourselves worthy or capable of something? 

Was it the environment we are in...the people that we are with...or just our general perception of things that influenced us to feel or think this way?

The greatest enemy...is simply ourselves.

After realizing shortcomings, facing failures in life, and getting ideas, emotions and actions dismissed from people we are conveying them to, we can get rather dissatisfied with certain aspects of ourselves, undermine our self-worth, and overlook value behind all the efforts that we have invested on something or someone.

But remember...we are worthy of every little investment we placed on something or someone, and
we are capable of achieving things that we wouldn't even imagine of achieving. Just because we're facing something that seems unattainable (or hard to bend and work together towards a common space...in terms of people), doesn't mean that it will be definitively unattainable, or will definitively stay a certain way.

Life is unexpected...but so is your potential to add value to your life and to the lives of others.
When you trust yourself and the whole process as you charge head on to your life's aspirations, you start to go easier on yourself, to realize the little, beautiful things in life, and to meet new opportunities and individuals...that just make you feel understood, blessed and wonderful. 

Do what you aspire to do, give every opportunity a shot and take the leap of faith...in simply one life.




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ABOUT ME
19 Year Old INFJ, attempting to see color in a seemingly gray world, delving deep into the unknown and deep recesses of life...and always in a quiet but dedicated and authentic pursuit of life.

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